Well, soon enough I’ll be back at the Gutter. Joe Clifford and Tom Pitts, custodians of Out of the Gutter’s Flash Fiction Offensive, have accepted a story of mine entitled “Some Solid Dick.” Now, I know you’re thinking and you’re way off. I hope. I don’t know. You might very well be on target.
British sensation Paul D. Brazill does a lot of writing. A lot. He’s also put together an anthology entitled “Exiles,” and I was lucky enough to get in on it. The contributing authors have been guest blogging over at his site about the origins of our stories. Mine is up today. Have at it, please. You can find it here.
Flash fiction doesn’t leave a lot of room for build-up, so it’s best to start by going for the throat and seeing where it leads. In these eighteen stories Ryan Sayles does just that. He turns on a dim light and leads the reader down an already claustrophobic path.
Active shooter event? Check. Ugly, failed relationships? Check. Dope fiends making smart decisions? Check. People seeking out roadkill because that’s the deepest relationship they can handle? Check. Putting on a soiled Easter Bunny costume to say goodbye the hard way to your former office colleagues who all foolishly thought they had the last laugh? Check and double check.
Each story is like an unmarked pill; just swallow it and see what happens. C’mon. It’ll be fun.
Grab it here.
Ladies and gentlemen, I am proud to inform you that the humor collection of the frickin’ century has arrived. Junk. Awhile back Chris Rhatigan had the idea to do a humor collection, and Chris Leek and I signed on. We got a few other folks, David James Keaton, Andrew Hilbert, Eric Beetner, Danger Slater and Jason Armstrong. Boom. It happened.
My story, “Invasion of the Demon Ninjas, or How a Modern Day Bathhouse Saved Our World,” features some familiar names (Brian, Chris, Chuck and Isaac *cough cough*) as they “finish up” at a roadside glory hole when evil ninjas from another dimension attack!
What more could you want? Get it!
Anyhoo, I just can’t ay enough about the dude. ‘Ol Chris Leek is one hell of a guy in his own right, he runs a blog, does book reviews for Out Of The Gutter and now is scooting down the road as published author.
His novella, Nevada Thunder, follows a boxer named Johnny who refused to take a fall in the ring and wound up doing time as payback. His surrogate sister Kara turns out to be very talented with digging herself in deeper than she can manage, and this time she’s done it with the people who hosed Johnny. Oops.
Watch this guy, folks. His shit dominates. he’s got a full list of his published fiction at his blog, and of course, since he’s ZP, he’s in there as well. Hammer down.
Well, since I haven’t done anything on here for a month or more, I have a lot to put out there. So, here goes:
All’s Well That Ends Well – My story about bullying. Well, a story about bullying. The good folks at Thunderdome were wonderful enough to put up there and even tacked a picture on for good measure. You gotta love when someone puts an image to your words.
Incident In The Workplace – I hate The Easter Bunny and I wanted to get published at Thrillers, Killers and Chillers in a bad way. Unfortunately for the world, TK’C shuttered their doors. But, Thrills, Kills ‘n Chaos sprung up in its place, helmed by Dave Barber of TK’C fame. So, I put this little ditty together and hoped they would pick it up. Post-bribes, they did.
Something Better – a forth coming *gasp* fantasy-type story that was picked up by the folks over at Fiction Magazines. Their fantasy edition, New Realm, took the story. It’s really a father and son story, and could be set anywhere. This one just happens to have acres of burning homeland behind them as dragons torch everything. And stuff like that.
They’re Pros, Each And Every One – my ridiculous bank robbery gone wrong story was accepted for Shotgun Honey‘s second anthology, Both Barrels: RELOADED. I loved every second of this story.
Over at CS DeWildt’s author page I got guest-blog about my favorite stuff: roadkill, running around pantless with a chainsaw and Ronald McDonald.
My story “Uncluttering,” about a mother who needs some room to breathe, is up at British noir site Near to the Knuckle. When I wrote that story, I needed to vent out. Bad. At first I figured it would be just for me because it … was off-putting. But I figured if people were going to read it, NTTK would have the balls to put it up. I think other sites have the balls as well–namely Out of the Gutter–but since I write for OOTG I figured I’d look elsewhere first. And NTTK did it. Thanks Daz and Craig. You guys throw down with the heavy weights.
Also, NTTK needs some love for their anthology Gloves Off. What a killer book. I mean it. Of course, I’m in it, but even if I wasn’t I’d still hold that collection in high esteem. If you like your fiction a little on the gritty side, here is your breakfast, lunch and dinner for weeks to come. It also features Zelmer Pulp authors Brian Panowich and Chris Leek, so you know it’s good.
Greetings folks. Brian Panowich, Chris Leek, Chuck Regan and Isaac Kirkman (and me, I guess) have thrown our collective hat into the world of science fiction for Zlmer Pulp’s next release, Hey! That Robot Ate My Baby!
Ebook should be available tonight, print should be ready later in the week. Here’s a preview:
Timejacked: The Rand Paradox
“In the 24th Century, the ultimate form of vanity is to create a personal alternate Earth timeline. Chlör Byzantine, a B-Grade web celebrity, travels to 1957 to stop Ayn Rand from ruining the future… but she is ready and waiting for him.”
THE WHORES OF GOD
“Earth in the 22nd Century is a nice place to visit, but you wouldn’t want to live there; the moral majority has taken a stand and if you want your kicks in 2132 you have to go off-world to get them. In the international waters of deep space everything is available, for a price. Jensen Corduroy is on a mission to get laid, but the Reverend Ellroy has a much higher purpose, he is on a mission from God.”
THIS PROTEAN LOVE
“Adelita Salazar, the last living border agent of her precinct patrols the Tierras Oscuras, the Dark Lands, in search of her missing brother, encountering killers, and refugees, human, and machine in a futuristic world where the nature of reality is as uncertain as her future.”
GEEK SQUAD 2.0
“In the 60’s and 70’s they did it with a bullet. In the 80’s and 90’s they did it with the media, but today if you want someone dead, it’s as easy as a Google search. The Geek Squad, bringing assassination to the modern age, but still can’t get dates for the prom.”
WHEREVER THE LIGHT ENDS
“In 1947, twins sisters disappear from the face of the Earth during the most horrific experience of their lives. Later they are found, and they have new parents, new scars and a desire for a new life. When they die in 2012, shut-ins and with no family and no friends, the results of that one disappearance mark the end for mankind.”
Brian Panowich, fireman/EMT, skinny jeans model and founding member of Zelmer Pulp needs your vote today. He’s been nominated for best short story for his two-part work, “if i ever get off this mountain / Coming Down The Mountain” at Spinetingler. It’s a big deal. The stories are worth reading. Hop on it!
Folks, Chris Rhatigan of All Due Respect fame let blabber about my favorite subject: me. We did it at his blog, Death By Killing. There I take the time to explain how incredible I am, how the world needs/owes me and I recommend some of my greatest accomplishments. Namely, well, everything. Ever.
Check it out, leave a comment and for God’s sakes, read Rhatigan’s stuff. The dude is damn good. He’s got a short story collection out right now and a novella coming out at the end of April through (KUBOA) press.
Rhatigan edited the All Due Respect anthology that features my story “Formula and Meth.”